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Monday, March 14, 2016

Part 6: Stronger Than Before

Part 6: Stronger Than Before

My best friend, who had moved to North Carolina with her husband who was a Marines, was home and wanted to come and visit. Brandon and I had planned on her coming to my apartment at school and then we were going to go out for margaritas at our favorite salsa bar.

Moments before she was due to get there, we got into the biggest fight yet. Just for background, Brandon and I had never fought until the night of that wedding. It may sound crazy and you might think, "but everyone fights," but we really didn't. Sure we had minor disagreements, but we never had a reason to fight and scream at each other before.

This time, we really didn't have a reason to fight or scream either, except that we were both so tense, confused, and angry about what had happened to us. As my friend rang the doorbell she walked into a war zone neither of us had ever stepped foot into together.

It was not either of our brightest moments, but I thank God that she stepped in when she did. Without hesitation she grabbed Brandon's arm and told him to come with her.

To this day, I don't know exactly what she said to him, though I have heard pieces from both of them. All I know is that when he stepped back into my apartment, things were different. They weren't fixed by any means, but we both had realized something very important.

We were fighting because of something someone else had done, someone's opinion, someone's reality, but it wasn't our reality. Really, our relationship was as strong as it had ever been. We had been through something so traumatizing and came out loving each other even more. They hadn't ruined our relationship, they had made it better.

-     -     -

Brandon and I got married July 11th of last year. The wedding was about half the size of what it would have been if this whole thing hadn't happened, but we were surrounded by people who truly loved and supported us. 

Through all of this, I think that was the most important lesson either of us have learned:

Life can get complicated sometimes and there will always be people there to tear you down. These people, regardless of blood relation, are not family. The people who love and support you no matter what are family.

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